


already gone

by xelated



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: ADHD isn't mentioned much, Alternate Universe - High School, American Football, Anorexia, Bilingual Lance (Voltron), Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Cuban Lance (Voltron), Depression, Eating Disorders, F/F, F/M, Gay Adam (Voltron), Gay Disaster Shiro (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Hurt Lance (Voltron), Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Insecure Lance (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Korean Keith (Voltron), Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron) Has ADHD, Lance (Voltron)-centric, M/M, Nonbinary Pidge | Katie Holt, Orphan Keith (Voltron), Past Allura/Lance (Voltron), Shiro (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-09-30 07:33:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17219645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xelated/pseuds/xelated
Summary: HIGH SCHOOL AU:Life is kind of a struggle at times.Especially when you're recovering from an eating disorder and have some nasty secrets hidden away.-warnings in tags





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> Lance & co. are all in junior year.  
> Shiro, Adam, Matt and Lotor are seniors.
> 
> i know nothing about American football so this should be fun.

 

shit shit sh-“

“language hermanito!” Adam yelled from the hallway, Lance just rolled his eyes and continued to rush around his room grabbing all the things necessary for the upcoming school day

“Mama! Where are my boots?” Lance asked as he stuck his head out his door 

“On the rack hijo!” She replied to which Lance nodded to himself and picked his bag up despite it still being unzipped. As soon as he was about to head for the stairs he was passed by Sylvio and Nadia who almost knocked him clean off his feet, he just laughed at the pair and followed them down to the kitchen.

His older brothers Marco and Luis along with his older sister Veronica were all sat around the table eating their breakfast although his twin sister Rachel was both eating and finishing a project for English simultaneously.

“Seriously Rachel?” Lance chuckled as he took his seat at the table, his mother kissed his temple muttering a good morning but soon went to find Sylvio and Nadia. The McClain household was absolute chaos in the mornings but he wouldn’t have it any other way, besides it distracts him from the constant buzz in his head.

Adam strolled into the room minutes later and slapped Lance on the back playfully causing the latter to choke on his toast. 

“dude- come on!” He looked at his older brother as if he’d just shot him in the foot. Lance may have many siblings but he was definitely closest to Adam, the shared interest in football was probably a big factor but ever since Lance was a baby Adam had always volunteered to look after him, he even occasionally cancelled his plans to do so. Lance had always looked up to Adam, he was incredibly determined in every aspect of his life and always seemed to know what to do. Adam was also openly gay and he was the first person Lance told about his bisexuality, a few months later he’d told his family but having Adam on his side always gave him the boost of confidence he needed. 

When he’d accidentally been outed at school in his sophomore year Lance had turned to Adam for support and the latter had given it without a second thought, during this time he’d gotten to know Adam’s best friend Shiro, who was now Adam’s boyfriend, and the captain of the football team.

Lance, Adam, Shiro, Hunk, Keith, James, Lotor and Acxa all played on the team along with some other classmates. Lance was proud to be the teams wide receiver since he’d worked his ass off in freshman and sophomore year to get the position. He only had one small tiny teeny problem with the team. Keith Kogane. 

Originally he’d had nothing against the guy in fact he may have had a little crush on him but Keith’s attitude was what irritated Lance, what made it worse is that Keith was Shiro’s brother, the same Shiro who dated his brother. This made for some awkward or very aggressive conversations with each other.

 

It was 8:30 by the time the McClain teens reached school leaving them half an hour to sort themselves out before morning registration. Rachel and Veronica headed off to the library so they could finish some work and check out a book or two while Adam and Lance went to the locker room to put their kit in the lockers.

Lance chucked his bag into his locker and sat on the bench by Adams locker while his brother put his things away more gently and neatly. 

“What are we doing after practice?” Lance asked “like are you heading off with Shiro? Or what?” 

“I’m going over to Takashi’s to finish some work-“ 

“Would that work be kissing a certain boyfriend” Lance teased earning a slap on the shoulder from Adam

“Shut up. But yeah you can come back to his house or take the bus” 

“I’ll take the bus thanks”

“Is this because of your little crush on cowboy Kogane?” Adam smirked, Lance glared at his brother with such intensity it may have been intimidating to anyone but Adam wasn’t phased.

“I do not have a crush on that guy- he has a mullet for fucks sake” Lance pouted making Adam chuckle at him

“Whatever helps you sleep at night” 

“bite me”

“Nah I think I’ll leave that to Kogane” Lance choked on air before launching himself at his brother who just laughed as Lance hit him, moments later Shiro walked in and paused in the doorway confused as to what the hell was happening, Adam spotted him first 

“Hey Takashi! Don’t mind Lance he’s just venting all his teen angst” 

“I am not! I swear t-“ Lance began to mumble rude things as he shoved Adam lightly and plopped back down onto the bench, Shiro shook his head fondly and strode over to his boyfriend to give him a kiss.

“Ready for practice this afternoon Lance?” Shiro asked turning to the younger McClain, said boys head snapped up to meet the calm gaze of the captain

“Oh- Yeah. I’m excited to be the wide receiver” 

“Well you deserve that position you worked hard for it” Lance beamed at the small praise, Adam smiled knowing that Lance liked to be reassured whenever something good happened to him. Lance pulled out his phone and checked the time only to see that they had fifteen minutes until registration so he excused himself from the locker room and headed towards his home room, once he did enter there were only a few people present including Romelle, Ezor, Zethrid and Keith. Lance made his way over to Romelle who was sat at her desk peacefully drawing in her notebook, he easily ignored the trio in the back corner which included the stares from Keith.

“Hey Romelle! Pretty flower” Lance gestured towards the beautifully sketched rose on the paper, Romelle looked up rather surprised but she quickly smiled at her friend before letting out a nervous laugh.

“Oh, thanks lance. Do you think Allura will like it?” She asked to which Lance just nodded

“A beautiful rose drawn by her beautiful girlfriend, how could she not love it” he nudged her arm playfully before sitting in his own seat on the right side of Romelle.

He pulled out his own sketchbook and continued his drawing of two lions- but not just any lions- robotic ones. He’d finished the larger blue one and only had the smaller red one to finish, the head and finer details were all that were left. He continued to draw until Hunk wandered into the classroom with Pidge by his side, the pair were rambling about some tech they were working on in their computer science class so Lance turned his attention back to his work not wanting to interrupt their conversation.

“Those look really good pointy chin!” Romelle said as she peered over to Lance’s sketchbook

“Pointy chin? Really Mel?” Lance chuckled and she soon joined in with him 

“What are you two giggling about?” Allura’s delicate tone drifted through the air

“Allura!” Romelle exclaimed, jumping up from her seat subsequently knocking her pencil off her desk. “Oops” She paused to look at the fallen item before dismissing it and giving Allura a good morning kiss, Lance looked away but smiled as he did so. He was happy that Allura was happy, the two of them had a little history nothing major. They’d briefly dated in sophomore year and Allura was the one to accidentally let it slip about Lance’s bisexuality, she had apologised profusely after the whole ordeal but Lance had easily forgiven her since she was a close friend. Sophomore year was the same year that Romelle had transferred to their school (Garrison High) from Altea, the local all girls private school. 

Allura and Romelle began dating 2 months before the end of sophomore year, Allura had even approached Lance about the matter worried that he would be mad at her for moving on so fast, but Lance being the guy he is was quick to reassure her that Romelle was the right one for her and that he’d have nothing against them being together. Of course this whole subject was around school within a matter of hours because nobody at the Garrison had any concern about privacy apparently.

 

Lance remained enveloped in his art until the teacher came in, his homeroom teacher Coran (he didn’t care all too much for formalities) was one of his favourite teachers aside from his art teacher, Miss Olkari. He’d set his book down and waited for the daily notices to be read and for everyone to nod as if they’d been listening. Once he was dismissed he waited outside the homeroom opposite theirs where James Griffin would be coming out any minute. James had formed a rather surprising friendship with Lance although the pair had a tendency to insult each other on a daily basis. 

When their class had finally been let out Lance latched onto James’ shoulder pulling him away from a sweet but loud girl called Nadia who just laughed at James as he was dragged away to science.

“Dude easy up on the pullin” James slapped Lance’s hands away gently 

“sorry man didn’t know you were so fragile” Lance teased, 

“Oh so it’s like that huh?” James suddenly yanked the handle on Lance’s bag and the latter tripped over his own feet and landed on the ground. He looked to his right on the floor only to see a pair of black lace up boots, his gaze turned upwards and he made eye contact with none other than Keith Kogane. 

Keith stared down at Lance with an amused expression before holding his hand out for Lance to take, which the boy did after a moments hesitation. Despite now standing eye to eye with Keith - well nearly eye to eye since Lance stood an inch or two taller-Lance didn’t let go of the others hand, he just stared at the shorter boy until James coughed and snapped Lance out of his trance. Unfortunately for Lance playing it cool wasn’t his strongest area of expertise, so instead of brushing the encounter off like it was nothing he became a flustered mess. But thank the universe fo James Griffin because he single handedly saved Lance’s ass by pulling him to their Physics lesson after sending a slightly apologetic look to Keith, emphasis on the slightly, James and Keith still had a bit of bad blood between them due to the events of sophomore year when James insulted Keith’s deceased father and the the other boy retaliated by punching James in the face. It earned them both a month of detention but Keith always said it was worth it. 

The rest of the classes were filled with some work but a lot of messing about with his friends for Lance. Lunch cane around but Lance spent it in the art room since his other friends were busy and he didn’t feel like hanging out with Adam and Shiro. Miss Olkari said it was okay for him to be in the art room as long as he didn’t make a mess, Lance had set his Lion sketch aside in favour of a galaxy painting he’d been wanting to do for a while. He always hid subtle pictures in his work, so that only the people who really paid attention would notice. In this particular painting he’d put the figure of a woman with her legs brought up to her chest slightly, and a man back to back with her. Lance was halfway through finishing the outer area of his work when the art room door creaked open to reveal Rachel. 

“Hey Rach” Lance smiled

“You didn’t come to lunch” 

“Straight to the point huh” 

“Lance” she said more sternly making him look up

“What?” He asked 

“You know what. I’ll tell mama if you don’t eat” Lance rolled his eyes at this

“You’re not my food log or babysitter Rach” 

“Come on hermano! You’re in recovery, you can’t just skip meals” Rachel started to sound slightly desperate for her brother to listen 

“Look it doesn’t matter if I miss one damn meal Rachel! It w-“

“It does matter!” Rachel growled “the last time you just missed on damn meal you started to miss all of them! Then you ended up in the damn hospital!” The girls eyes had a slight shine to them as she spoke and yet Lance took no notice

“Oh for fucks sake Rachel just back off and mind your own business for once! I know it’s hard since you feel the need to insert yourself into every subject” Lance spat 

“I don’t even know why I try sometimes” she muttered wiping her eyes as she stormed out the room. 

Lance stood still for a moment before he cracked. 

He grabbed his canvas and threw it at the nearest wall, he then took his paint brushes and flung them on the floor and slammed his hand on the table with a frustrated groan subsequently spilling the water from the cup on his desk. Lance sank to the floor covering his face with his hands which still had some paint on them. He lowered one arm and took a look at his wrist where the faded scars laid, the sound of the door creaking open made Lance roughly pull his sleeve up and dry his face. He was about to make up some random excuse but he stopped as soon as he saw who had entered. 

Keith. 

_Of fucking course._


	2. II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more mature themes near the end i guess so be warned.

Keith stepped further into the room warily, his eyes stayed on Lance as if the boy was a wild animal that could attack at any moment. He picked up the canvas and carefully placed it onto the nearest desk, Lance just continued to stare at the dark haired boy not daring to move a muscle.

“Are you- are you okay?” Keith broke the silence “shit that’s probably the worst thing I could ask sorry” Keith continued to move closer to the brunette with slow and steady movements, “do you wanna sit down or?” Keith trailed off 

“how- “ Lance cleared his throat “how much of that did you hear?” He stuttered, Keith hesitated before answering

“All of it” he said sounding ashamed 

“Oh god oh god-“ Lance rambled his voice shaking, he sank back to the floor and resumed his previous position. Keith was quick to join the other boy on the floor, they sat in silence for several minutes before Lance began to talk

“You can’t tell anyone” he whispered 

“I won’t- I would never” 

“Really? Because you have some really good blackmail material right now” 

“Lance I would never tell anyone about this not unless you wanted me too” Keith spoke softly which helped Lance calm down slightly, “do your friends know?” Lance shook his head as a reply “not even Romelle? Isn’t she your best girl friend or neighbour or something?” Lance once again shook his head 

“she’s my best friend yes but she doesn’t know” his reply was almost inaudible 

“Does my brother know?” 

“Not unless Adam has told him but Shiro hasn’t said anything about it to me so I’m guessing not” Lance took a deep breathe in trying to calm himself further “ _oh god_ ” he breathed out before pushing himself to stand up, his knees cracking in protest. Keith just stared at him as the Cuban boy walked around the room cleaning up the mess he made, after a moment or two Keith got up to help. Lance collects the brushes whilst Keith went back over to the painting, he picked it up tentatively and studied it, there was a rip in the canvas across the middle

“This is really good Lance” 

“I am an art student so it’s supposed to be good” he chuckled nervously as he continued to clean up the spilled water on the desk

“The people hidden in the galaxy” he paused “It’s like they’ve been apart and yet they have found a way to be together in the stars or something like that, I’m not sure what you were going for” Lance looked at him slightly stunned

“Oh- that’s actually pretty spot on. How’d you guess?” 

“English student”

“Ah makes sense, damn I never could get the hang of English. I prefer Spanish” 

“You’re Cuban right? I’m guessing Spanish is your first language right?”

“Yes and yes. Spent years trying to learn English and lose the Spanish accent-“

“Why?” Keith interrupted, Lance opened and closed his mouth slightly taken a back 

“I used to get bullied for my accent. Kids and parents used to be pretty racist towards me and my family” Lance’s smile fell 

“Well then they’re assholes” Keith said quickly causing lance to laugh at his fast response 

“You know you’re not so bad” 

“What? What do you mean not so bad?”

“Hate to break it to you cowboy but you have a shitty attitude sometimes” 

“Gee thanks” Keith muttered with a small smile “wait- cowboy?” He questioned 

“Yep” Lance said popping the p. “So are we like bro’s now or what?” 

“I don’t hate your guts so yeah I guess so”

“Cool. Cool cool cool” Lance raised his eyebrow “does this mean I’m the yee to your haw?” He wiggled his eyebrows but Keith just glared at him “what?” 

 

—

 

The pair had managed to clean up the mess just before Miss Olkari returned, they then went separate ways to their last classes, Lance going to Math whilst Keith went to History.

Despite his best efforts to stop, Lance was still freaking out. Keith said he wouldn’t say anything but Lance still felt on edge, he expected it to be around the whole school and if that did happen it would crush him.

His own families reactions to his ‘problem’, as they’d dubbed it, where all different. Adam being the grade A human being is was truth be told slightly mad at first, and he probably still was but Lance couldn’t blame him, but Adam was supportive. Rachel had refused to talk to him for weeks and she’d been dragged to see Lance in visiting hours but she wouldn’t utter a word and it did sting but once again he couldn’t really blame her, Luis and Marco didn’t exactly understand why Lance stopped eating but after Veronica who was much like Adam on the subject, explained it to them they didn’t seem to act angry towards him. His niece and nephew didn’t fully understand either but they were sad that Lance was in hospital and couldn’t play with them. 

Lance’s parents were the hardest to deal with.

When he’d first come out of the hospital his mother had been all over him and kept fussing which became slightly suffocating for Lance although he wouldn’t ever tell her that because he loved her too much, his father in the other hand was less affectionate. His father had yelled at him on numerous occasions about the matter, more than once did he call Lance weak and other demeaning things. He’d crushed Lance’s confidence without even knowing it, he said he was making Lance more of a man, since having an eating disorder made Lance’s dad see him as less of a man than he was before. 

His father was out a lot more than he was in since he worked as a pilot and was often busy, not that Lance minded that much.

 

Lance spent the whole math lesson writing random equations ignoring the concerned looks Romelle gave him. He would tell her eventually probably once he was further into his recovery. It’d been hard lying to her throughout the whole summer break, he spent his whole summer in hospital starting his recovery process. Romelle has frequently tried to contact him and meet up but he just told her that he’d been in Cuba and his phone didn’t work well over there, it was almost the truth because the McClain’s supposed to go back to Cuba to see their grandparents and some did go. 

Romelle was used to Lance having off days so she likes to make sure he knew she was there if he needed to talk, today this reassurance came in the form of a little sketch of the two of them riding a dolphin. Lance only saw it at the end of the lesson and smiled at the picture before placing it carefully into his wallet so he could add it to his wall where all the other little drawings from friends and family were put.

Lance was last out the room and he slowly made his way to the locker room hoping most of the guys would be ready and already out on the field. He still had issues with his figure and he was well aware his ribs were slightly visible, although he did have quite a bit of muscle on him due to the excessive exercise he had done and all the practice for football he did. Lance was naturally lanky and thin so even the idea of him being anorexic didn’t even cross their mind, but now Keith knew and now he was another person who would stare and judge him with or without words it wouldn’t matter. 

The locker room was filled with around half the team by now including Hunk, James, Keith, Shiro and Adam - who stared at Lance as he walked in. Rachel had ratted him out to Adam. Of course. He just quickly darted past his brother, head down, got his kit from his locker and headed to the back of the locker room where less people were. Lance got changed in record time and left the room as fast as possible. 

Practice was brutal. Absolute fucking torture. Their coach had made them run drills for an hour before they got into a mock game and Lance had been knocked down a few times by Hunk and Shiro who both apologised afterwards, the only person who didn’t apologise was Rolo. He just sneered at Lance and left him on the ground, the guy had an issue with him because Nyma had taken a liking to Lance.

He’d seen Keith rubbing his shoulder and he’d been caught not so subtly staring by Keith who didn’t seem to care. Lance briefly remembered Adam saying something about Keith messing up his shoulder but he hadn’t really paid any mind to it until now.

Once practice was over, Lance waited till most people had left, Adam had gone to him to say goodbye and to tell him he’d see him at home his tone was more aggressive than usual which left Shiro and Keith standing behind him feel awkward, but the trio soon left much to Lance’s relief. He was the last one in there and was just pulling his shirt over his head when he heard the door lock. Lance froze and audibly gulped. The sound of footsteps became louder and soon enough his coach came around the corner and leaned up against the locker. His coach - Mark Worthing - looked Lance up and down before approaching the teen and placing his hand on Lance’s hip, pushing his thumb under the shirt and onto tanned skin which made Lance shiver at the touch. Said boys gaze was everywhere but his coach, and the older man noticed this so he used his other hand to lift Lance’s chin so the boy would be forced to look at him. Blue eyes met brown ones and then Mark began to speak

“You were really good out there Lance. The way you moved across that field, you looked _stunning_. Although you seemed a little off today” he pouted slightly “it’s probably because you were too excited for this because it’s our first time together since the summer. Have you been avoiding me?” 

“No of course not sir I was just busy is all” Lance stuttered 

“It’s a shame” Mark removed his hand from Lance’s chin and slid it underneath the boys shirt going over his stomach and chest, Lance grit his teeth together trying not to scream until his throat burned. “You feel fatter than before. I don’t know if that’s an improvement or not. Oh well” he sighed moving the hand from Lance’s hip further back. He was about to place it even lower when the sound of the door handle rattling stopped him, Lance wanted to yell out to whoever was trying to get in but he knew if he did that it probably wouldn’t help him. He peered up at Mark to see him press a finger on his lips signalling him to he quiet, Lance obeyed and looked back towards the floor. 

 

On the other side of the door was an frustrated Keith who had left his phone in his locker. 

“For fucks sake” he muttered to himself before walking back out to his brothers car where he and Adam were.

“You get it?” Shiro asked as soon as Keith threw his bag onto the back seat and sat beside it

“No” he huffed, closing the car door “stupid door was locked” 

“Huh that’s odd” Shiro murmured 

“Yeah” 

 

“Now where were we Lancey?” Mark turned back to Lance, his hand now firmly situated on his behind. 

“I really have to go sir” he stuttered trying to get out of the others grip

“So soon? I don’t think so, we have catching up to do” Mark said darkly 

“Please sir my mama is expecting me” 

“Well she can wait a few more minutes can’t she?” He smiled down at Lance, his hands felt cold on his skin, cold and dirty. 

 

Lance just wished that whoever was at the door had been more persistent and found their way in so he could get _the fuck_ out of there. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> btw Mark is in his mid/late twenties  
> -  
> thanks for reading this chapter!  
> comment if you want/have time,  
> -  
> also updates are random because i can't stick to schedules lmao.


	3. III

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter skips all over the place so sorry about that-
> 
> !!Keith & Lance have become very good friends in a very short amount of time due to their shared interest etc.!!
> 
> i also changed it so Lance is slightly taller than Keith because i'm dumb and forgot oops

just a quick note: when i think of Lance & Keith in this fic i often think back to the leakira concept designs, (especially this image)

(also they have earings, although Keith has more, i just love the idea of it lmao)

\----

 

 

Lance eventually got home at six due to the bus being late and traffic being a bitch. He tried to enter the house as quietly as possible so he wouldn’t be grilled by his family on his whereabouts because he honestly couldn’t deal with that right now. He shut the door with a soft click and breathed a sigh of relief, he placed his keys into the bowl by the door and began to make his way up the stairs but he was stopped dead in his tracks by his mothers voice 

“Leandro? Is that you?” She called out, Lance winced but still slowly made his way to the kitchen. When he stepped foot into the room and looked up he was met with his mother, Adam, Veronica, Rachel and Marco who all stared at him as soon as he entered.

“Look mama I’m sorry I’m back late I was.. talking with coach and the bus was late and I really don’t feel like talking right now-“ he rambled

“No. You are gonna talk right now Leandro!” his mother Rosa interrupted, Lance rolled his eyes but still looked back to Rosa “Rachel and Adam told me you skipped lunch” she said more calmly, Lance squirmed under the gaze of his mother and siblings, he subconsciously dug his nails into his palms to ease his anxiety. When he didn’t answer, Rosa continued “why? At l least tell me that, you owe us that much at least” Lance was starting to lose it. His mind was running a mile a minute and the pain in his palms intensified as he pushed his nails down harder. 

“I don’t owe anyone anything! Okay? I forgot alright I fucking forgot to eat! It’s not like I’m the only person who does that- you’re all so suffocating sometimes! I just- sometimes you make me feel like I can’t breathe” Lance’s voice was barely a whisper when he finished talking and his family stared at him with expressions of anger and shock, the words that he’d just yelled at his family finally caught up with him, guilt and regret settled in his mind. “I- Mama I’m-“ Rosa held her hand up to silence Lance 

“We have been nothing but supportive to you Leandro, and you just yell at us? Insult us? What has gotten into you recently! I assumed it was just you being a normal teenager but this is ridiculous. Now get out of my sight. I can’t stand to look at you right now” Lance’s eyes began to sting, the tears slowly building, he wanted nothing more than to take everything back and he was about to apologise but Adam got up and went towards him

“Go Lance. You’ve done enough” His tone was stone cold and sent a small shiver down Lance’s spine. He nodded and averted his eyes before rushing up the stairs, grabbing his bag on the way, and as soon as he shut his door he crashed down faced first on his bed. 

Lance stayed like this for what felt like hours until there was a knock at his door

“Come in” Lance said, his voice muffled by the pillow, his door swung open and he barely registered the person walking in, setting a plate of food on his bedside table and leaving swiftly. Lance moved his head to see what he had been given, it was chicken pie, Lance’s favourite. He swung his legs over his bed, picked the plate up and sat at his desk with the fork in hand and yet he couldn’t bring himself to take a bite. He thought back to what his coach had said, was he really that much fatter? Was it that easy to notice? Lance went to his mirror and lifted his shirt to inspect his stomach, his coach wasn’t wrong- he had gained weight. Lance pulled his shirt down quickly and scrubbed his face with his hands whilst groaning in frustration

“What the fuck is wrong with me” he asked himself “why can’t I just- be normal”

On the other side of the door sat Veronica, she listened as her little brother doubted and insulted himself, she wanted to go in and give him a hug but Rosa had said he needed to be left for the night. Adam passed Lance’s door doing a double take when he saw Veronica. 

“Come on Ronnie, you know he was out of order” Adam reasoned, she sighed pushing loose hair back behind her ear 

“I know- I know, it’s just I worry that he’ll relapse. I can’t see him like that again” Adam’s expression softened and he held out his hand to his sister.

“I can’t either” he said once she was standing “but he needs to know that he can’t speak to mama like that. Or anyone really” Veronica nodded numbly and left for her room, Adam doing the same. 

Meanwhile Lance had jumped in the shower so he could try and get rid of any trace of what had happened earlier. He scrubbed at the bruises on his hips and wrists until his skin went red. He saw his razor on the shower floor and wanted nothing more than to cut over the bruises. Take away the feeling of his hands. But Lance stopped himself knowing that if he did that then he’d be yelled at even more.

Once out the shower and in his sweatpants Lance returned to his desk where the pie sat, he managed to get down a few bites before having to step away, just the thought of himself gaining any weight made him feel uncomfortable. Despite this he still got a couple more chunks of pie down since he reasoned that he could just work out for longer when he next went to the gym. Lance left the half eaten pie on the desk and buried himself in the bed covers slowly slipping into a deep sleep.

 

—

 

The next morning in the McClain household was tense to say the least. 

Lance grabbed his toast and quickly left the house to dash next door so he could walk to school with Romelle. 

“Hey Lance! Picking me up at my door? Should Allura feel threatened?” She joked

“Nah. Never could compete with the princess” he winked playfully.

The pair made their way to school whilst chatting about anything and everything including Lance’s newfound friendship with Keith.

“Still don’t believe it” 

“Well you better! Although I do have some doubts considering I asked him if i was the yee to his haw” Romelle burst out laughing even having to stop in the middle of the sidewalk to catch her breath which made them get a few odd looks from people passing by.

“Shut up” Lance slapped her shoulder 

“Okay- but the yee to his haw?” 

“He’s from Texas- and I was panicking!” 

“Yeah that much is obvious. God your such a dork” 

“But I’m your favourite dork”

“You know it” Romelle smiled back at the taller boy who returned the gesture “right well we better keep walking or we’ll be late” 

 

They reached school with plenty of time to spare but unfortunately they’d also walked in just as Adam, Rachel and Veronica got out of Adam’s car. 

“Oh your brother and sisters are here! Wanna go say hi?” Romelle asked Lance happily 

“Not really” Romelles smile fell

“Is everything okay?” She asked glancing at the McClain trio and back to her friend but not before she caught Adam’s gaze.

“Let’s just go Mel I’ll tell you later” Romelle just nodded, linked her arm with Lance’s and walked into the main building.

They sat in their seats once they reached their home room all while continuing their conversation, Keith - who was in his usual seat too alongside Ezor - quickly excused himself to go speak to Lance. 

“Hey Lance” Lance looked in his direction and his face seemed to light up 

“Oh- hey Keith. You know Romelle” he gestured towards the blonde

“Yeah hey Romelle, we have English together right?” Romelle hummed in agreement and she too excused herself to go talk to Ezor. 

“You doing okay after yesterday?” Keith asked as soon as Romelle left. lance’s stomach dropped thinking Keith was referring to his ‘talk’ with coach until he realised he meant the art room fiasco

“Yeah I guess” Keith raised an eyebrow clearly not convinced “I had a fight with my mama and I yelled at her so now Adam is blanking me which is fucking fantastic but I really do feel bad and- now I’m rambling sorry” 

“It’s fine. And that sucks- I hope it all gets sorted out” Keith wrung his hands together “sorry I’m bad at comforting people. It’s not my strong suit” Lance chuckled quietly 

“I figured, you never really seemed very social” 

“Well you’re right there, I hate most people.”

“But not me?” Keith shook his head

“Not you” 

 

—

 

“I forgot to ask before but do you wanna come round my place for dinner one of these days? My parents miss you” Romelle asked Lance as they took their seats at the usual lunch table 

“Sure I don’t see why it’ll be a problem plus I’d love to see your dads again they’re absolute legends” Romelle giggled at his reply 

“They sure are” the pair talked about upcoming tests and other things until Keith approached them

“Can I sit?” Lance turned his attention towards Keith who was stood awkwardly at the end of the table by Romelle

“Yeah of course” Lance said rather excitedly, Romelle shuffled along the bench so Keith could sit down all whilst smiling at Lance like a little demon.

“So. Keith” Romelle started “did Lance really ask if he could be the _yee to your haw_?” Lance’s eyes widened and Keith choked on his water 

“Romelle” Lance groaned, laying his head in his arms “why?” His voice was muffled by his arms, Keith looked down at Lance with an expression that Romelle could only describe as ‘ _fuckin whipped_ ’ 

“But did he?” 

“Yes he asked me that after calling me cowboy” Romelle spluttered 

“Oh this just gets better and better!” She practically cackled at the new revelation and it caused a few heads to turn including Adam’s and Shiro’s. 

“Romelle~ shut up” Lance said in a sing-song voice, Romelle just lifted both her hands in resignation 

“erm Lance why is your brother glaring daggers into your back?” Keith asked as he spotted Adam a few tables behind Lance. Said boys eyes darted between the questioning look of his best friend and the reassuring look of his newest one. 

He took a moment before he began to explain the chaos at the McClain household.

 

“Since when were they friends?” Shiro asked Adam pointing his fork rather forcefully in the direction of his brother, unfortunately for Matt being opposite Shiro was the worst place to be at this point in time since as he waved the fork around some of the salad that once sat their flung off of the cutlery and onto Matt’s face.

“oops sorry Matt” Adam shoved his hand over his mouth to muffle his laughs, Matt on the other hand was not impressed. He took the lettuce off his face and proceeded to throw it back at Shiro who scowled at his friend.

“ _Anyway_ ” Shiro said through gritted teeth whilst he chucked the lettuce into the bowl “what’s up with you and Lance?” Adam sighed laying his chin in his palm

“He completely blew up at my mama” Shiro looked up to Lance who seemed to be engaged in what looked like a very interesting conversation with Keith and Romelle, then he looked back to Adam.

“I mean he’s acting like nothing even happened! He’s been like this ever since he came out of the hospital- he’s been all chipper and saying that he’s fine and-“ 

“Wait, the hospital? My god is he okay?” Shiro interrupted his rambling boyfriend, Adam froze realising what he’d just said. 

“I have to go- I’ll see you later Takashi” and with that he grabbed his bag and rushed out the canteen 

“Wait! Adam-“ Shiro tried to call after him but he was already gone, Shiro looked towards Matt with a pained expression 

“It’ll be fine Shiro. Don’t worry about it I’m sure it’s nothing too bad” Matt squeezed his best friends hand and continued to finish his lunch but Shiro’s mind was a mess, wondering what on earth happened to the young McClain.

 

—

 

As Lance headed to his last class, which was a study period, with Keith by his side he noticed Adam leaning against his locker with Shiro but the former boy seemed upset. Lance looked over worriedly, Keith noticed what was bothering Lance and gently tugged on his shirt 

“Come on we’ll be late” he said softly, Lance nodded and went off to their class.

 

Time seemed to be slower than normal, well for Keith anyway. Although it wasn’t all bad since he’d switched from his usual seat in the back corner to the one beside Lance in the middle row. Throughout the whole class the pair had been passing notes and chatting in hushed whispers, they only got away with it since their teacher was too enveloped in their book to care about what the students were doing.

Once class was let out, Keith followed Lance to his locker so he could continue to try and convince Lance that mothman was real. 

“There have been sightings of mothman for years Lance! I’m tellin you he’s real” The brunette chuckled at his friends antics as he opening his locker 

“Okay okay sure I believe you” he said sarcastically whilst shoving books into his locker 

“Come on man- he’s fuckin real! Right it’s decided. One of these days I’m taking you to the place mothman was last spotted and we’re gonna hunt him down” Keith said determined to convince his new friend 

“Are you asking me to be your mothman hunting partner?” 

“Yes.” Keith said seriously 

“Okay then I’m in” Lance smiled at Keith’s happy and excited expression 

“Awesome. Well I gotta go big brother Shirogane is waiting” 

“See ya Keith!” Lance watched as Keith jogged over to Shiro who was stood at the end of the hall 

“You will believe!” He yelled as he disappeared into the crowd. Lance stood looking at the spot he’d last seen Keith for a moment before huffing and locking his locker. Romelle had left with Allura already so Lance began walking home alone, a small sense of dread swimming in his mind.

 

“Hey Keith can I talk to you?” Shiro asked after peering around Keith’s door, said boy looked up from his phone and his text conversation with Lance to see his brother looking awkward- well more awkward than usual.

“Yeah sure what’s up?” His tone was flooded with confusion and slight concern, Shiro now stepped into the room and sat opposite Keith who was on his bed. He hesitated, fiddling with his nails, he saw Keith stare at him patiently and decided to just come out with it 

“Do you” Shiro cleared his throat “you and Lance are friends right?”

“Yes-“ Keith dragged the word out, confused as to where this was going 

“Well Adam said something earlier and I was worried but erm.. do you know why Lance was in hospital?” Keith’s eyes widened, his eyes flicked away from Shiro’s questioning gaze. 

He fumbled with his words, suddenly finding his fingernails extremely interesting.

“Keith?” Shiro pressed on the subject although not aggressively or threateningly.

 

The teen sighed, then he spoke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed the chapter!  
> i promised a friend of mine i'd include the mini mothman obsession (so ur welcome Soph)  
> -
> 
> leave a comment if you want/have time :)
> 
> -  
> also you can leave suggestions for 'scenes you'd like to see' whether that be for fluff scenes or serious ones


	4. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slightly long chapter for you all :)  
> -  
> I’ve been planning this chapter since the beginning so I’m excited to finally get it out!  
> Also the side Lotor plot was thought up by myself & my friend at like 1am because she’s set on Lotor being like this so-

Over the weekend Lance had spent as much time away from his family as possible. They were still mad and he couldn’t deal with it at the moment, he knew he shouldn’t run from his problems but he needed an argument free weekend so he spent a lot of time with Keith including Saturday night.

 

“Hey you staying over?”

“Yeah if that’s cool. I don’t fancy returning home just to be glared at and force fed a million different meals” Lance muttered the last part but Keith heard and a small frown found its way to his lips. He set the fresh popcorn in Lance’s lap and went back to the kitchen to grab a glass of water.

“Man you make the best popcorn” Lance exclaimed, taking another piece of the sweet food

“Thanks, I pride myself in creating the most exquisite tasting popcorn” Lance chuckled at Keith’s reply and returned his attention back to the movie they’d chosen, tonight they were watching a random movie they’d found on Netflix.

“I’m glad we’re friends Keith” Lance spoke quietly. Keith looked over to the other boy who was watching the screen with a blank look, he smiled

“Me too” he too looked back at the tv screen “but I have literally no idea what’s going on with this movie”

“Neither do I”

“Wanna go upstairs and get some rest?”

“Sure lets go” the pair went upstairs as quietly as possible since both Shiro and his mother were asleep, Keith opened his door and let Lance in first who stopped in the centre of the room.

“You really are not a good drawer buddy” Lance said pointing towards a badly drawn picture of a lion. He looked at the messy desk and picked up a framed photo that sat in the corner, he wiped the thin layer of dust from the top of the frame and studied the picture.

“Who are they?” Lance turned the photo in Keith’s direction, said boys face fell ever so slightly and Lance noticed the change in mood “Sorry- it doesn’t matter. I shouldn’t be snooping anyway” he places the photo back to its place among the various books and papers.

“You can borrow some sweats and a shirt to sleep in” Keith said gesturing to a neatly folded pile of clothes

“Thanks” Lance stood staring at the other boy for a minute but shook himself out of his trance and awkwardly started pointing to the bathroom whilst saying he’d just get changed. Whilst Lance got changed in the bathroom, Keith changed as well, once he’d changed he grabbed extra pillows and blankets and set them on the floor in a neat pile before sitting down on them. Lance emerged minutes later and stared down at Keith, confused

“What are you doing?”

“You can take the bed”Keith gestured to his bed

“Er no. We can share the bed because it’s pretty much built for four people” Lance held his hand out and lifted Keith to his feet once the boy had a grip. Keith settled under the covers and Lance the joined him. They stayed in a comfortable silence before Keith broke it

“My parents. The picture.” He clarified, Lance hummed and have a small nod that was only identifiable by the quiet rustle of the sheets “my dad died in a fire. He was a firefighter, died saving a lady and her child” He added “and my mom. She- well she just kinda left”

“I’m sorry Keith”

“No no no. You don’t apologise. And quite frankly if anyone else had said that they’d have a knuckle in the side of their face”

“Jesus Keith, so violent”

“Yeah well that’s what comes with anger issues” Lance bolted upright

“You have anger issues?” He asked rather disbelievingly. Keith shuffled so he was facing Lance

“How did you not know?” He huffed out a small laugh “it’s one of the main reason I did football”

“I had no idea man. I just thought you were grumpy all the time. Plus you don’t act out or.. stuff- I don’t know”

“I go to therapy once a week. I used to be so much worse when I was in care though, stupid kids don’t know how to keep their hands off my stuff. It’s actually how I got my scar” Keith lightly traced the scar that ran from underneath his jaw up to cheekbone.

“What exactly did you do?”

“This kid took the picture of my family and started saying shit so I hit him and he threw a glass at my face”

“Holy shit” Lance collapsed back onto the mattress with a small thud

“I seem to be learning new things about you everyday cowboy”

“Same here. You’re an interesting guy Lance”

“Thank you? I guess” Lance tucked his arm behind his head “it kinda scares me how fast we’ve become friends” he sighed “not that it’s a bad thing!” He quickly amended

“It’s weird for me too. You’re one of the few people who know about my parents”

“And you’re one of the few people who knows about my issue” Lance shut his eyes “promise me you’ll stay by my side” he extended his arm out in front of where Keith would be, his pinky finger sticking out, Keith made out the shadow and locked his own finger with Lance’s

“I promise” he almost whispered. Their fingers stayed together for a moment but they soon let their hands separate and fall to their sides again. Lance turned on his side and tried to sleep leaving Keith to stare at the dark ceiling, a small pit of guilt settling at the pit of his stomach.

-

 

When Keith woke up he felt something pressed up against his arm, he rubbed his eyes with his right hand and looked to his side. Through bleary eyes he made out a brown mop of curly hair against his shoulder, it was Lance laying face down tangled in the sheets. Lance was starting to shift around so Keith gave him a little nudge causing the brunette to crack open his eye. Lance groaned and twisted his head so he was facing Keith, he gave him a tired smile and crashed back down into the pillow face first,

“Come on Lance, wake your ass up” in response the other boy just raised his hips so he formed an upside down V shape “really?” Keith said emotionless, but Lance’s muffled giggles could be heard o his left, Keith responded by grabbing a pillow from his other side and whacking Lance over the head with it. Said boy shot up looking scandalised, he gasped with a hand to his heart

“Such violent behaviour señor!” He joked and he too took his pillow and whipped it round so fast that Keith didn’t have time to comprehend what was happening so he ended up getting a pillow to the face. Their childish fight continued until Shiro opened the door.

Their laughter stopped once they noticed the older boy, looking at one another with a face that just said ‘I’ll try not to laugh if you do the same’

“Right. Well um I’m heading out but there’s some pancakes downstairs” Shiro was turning to leave when he snapped his fingers and looked back to the pair “oh and moms headed out to work because she got called in to cover a shift but she did make the pancakes so your safe” Shiro’s gaze lingered on Lance before he turned once more and shut the door, his footsteps becoming quieter the further he went. As soon as the door shut and the footsteps couldn’t be heard both boys took one look at each other and burst into a fit of laughter.

-

Lance ate his way through two pancakes before deciding he’d had enough. It was just the right amount. Not too many so that he’d feel like throwing up but not too few so it was worrying. Now that Keith knew it was another person to keep from worrying, luckily Keith hadn’t explicitly talked about the subject with him so he felt calm whenever he was around the shorter boy.

“Those were delicious. You gotta thank your mama for me” Lance sat back in the chair patting his stomach with a satisfied face,

“I’ll make sure I do” Keith said with a mouthful of pancakes.

 

They messed about and hung out together for an hour or two before Lance checked the time and decided he should go home.

“It’s time to face the music I guess” Lance scratched the back of his neck awkwardly as he and Keith stood by the door

“I guess. Hey text me if anything goes down yeah?”

“You got it buddy” Lance gave him a small slightly unsure smile and left the Kogane/Shirogane residence. As soon as he left the driveway he shoved his earphones in and put on his music as loud as his ears could take, to try drown out his thoughts, although they were always too loud.

Keith stood by the door, his thoughts only on Lance. He hoped it would be okay, he hoped Lance could be happy.

 

-

 

“I’m home” Lance called out once he closed his front door. He could hear the giggles and yelling of his niece and nephew as well as his brother and sister in law trying to calm them down. Lance pulled out his earphones and started to make his way upstairs, he wanted to find his mama and properly apologise to her, Adam and Rachel. He decided to try his twin first, so he went to the room adjacent to his own. Lance gave the hardwood door three soft knocks before a small ‘come in’ was heard, he pushed open the door and smiled at Rachel sheepishly, the older girl gave him a look that was somewhere between anger and sympathy? Maybe.

“Hey Rach I just wanted to properly apologise for the other week. I shou-“

“Lance it’s fine-“

“No it’s not” he interrupted her “I was an asshole to you when you were just looking out for me. I said some things I didn’t mean and I’m sorry. I love you Rach and you’ve been there for me, maybe occasionally a little bitchy but-“

“Really lance?” She giggled

“Look I just wanted to make things right. I can’t stand not having you with me, you mean too much to me”

“Come here” Rachel mumbled, extending her arms out towards Lance, making grabbing motions with her hands. Lance quickly paced across the room to meet her in the middle with a hug. Rachel frowned slightly when she felt how thin Lance still was but she didn’t comment on it, she just savoured this moment. Lance pulled away with a smile

“I gotta go apologise to Adam and mama so I’ll see you at dinner?” Rachel nodded in response but before Lance could leave she stopped him

“Just to let you know, papa is back” Lance nodded, forced a smile and left his sister behind in her room heading off to his brothers room.

Once again he knocked like he had before and Adam’s response had been the same as Rachel’s.

“Hey Adam” the older boy spun around on his chair to face Lance who stood by the door awkwardly. “Listen I just wanted to say sorry for last week. It was way out of order and I had no right to go off on you guys like that” the words jumbled out of Lance’s mouth faster than before.

“Uh- it’s- it’s fine Lance” Adam smiled but dropped it quickly “look I’m really busy right now but don’t sweat it okay?”

“Oh. Yeah okay. I’ll leave you be then” Lance said rather taken aback by his brothers mood “I’ll see you later” he gave a small wave and left the room and his odd brother.

Lance shook his head slightly and went back to his room only to find it occupied by two people. His parents.

Lance’s eyes darted between the two of them and then to what they were both staring at. His journal, given to him by his therapist, something to help him, something that was private.

“What the hell are you guys doing?!” Lance ran to his parents and tried to grab the book but his father held him back “You can’t read that! It’s private!” Lance was shouting now, furious at his parents.

“We can read it Leandro, we are you parents, and we need to know what is going on in your head so we can fix your problem!” His father practically snarled, Lance looked at his mama who was reading through the book with a hand cast over her mouth in shock. By this time all Lance’s yells had travelled through the house and his brothers and sisters were now standing by the door, Veronica was standing just in the rooms threshold.

“Please mama stop reading it!” Lance pleaded with his mother, scared of what she might read. He’d not written of his time with his coach in a way that was clear or easily understandable, he did it in a way that only made sense to him, but everything else was as clear as day when read aloud. “Papa- let go!” He tried to pry himself from his fathers strong grip, the mans hands were gripping the spot where another mans hands had been only days before.

“Do you really think this Leandro?” His mother asked shakily, Lance was at a loss, he couldn’t deny it and yet just confirming it would make everything worse. He started stuttering trying to form a sentence of some kind and his mother took that as a yes, she nodded sadly and looked back down to the book.

“Please” Lance whispered desperately

“Mama what is that?” Rachel asked from the doorway

“You wanna know what that is?!” Lance’s father- Raphael - yelled at his eldest daughter, Veronica flinched at the tone of his voice and the volume

“That” he pointed towards the book that Rosa was gripping with shaky hands “is little Lance’s diary! It’s where he spills out all the shit going on upstairs” he jabbed at his head “it’s where he says the truth. About everything and everyone”

“Papa it’s mine! You have no right going through my private stuff! It’s supposed to be between me and my therapist!” Lance yelled, his eyes were filled with tears at this point

“Oh stop crying! You’re a man. You don’t cry! And this problem of yours has done nothing but put a rift in this family!” Raphael yelled in his sons face and roughly shoved him to the ground. Lance stayed still not daring to move. Raphael soon pushed his way through the door and stormed downstairs, Veronica went up to Rosa and gently took the book from her grasp and closed it, lightly pushing her mother towards the door where Marco took initiative and led Rosa out of the room. Luis guided little Sylvio and Nadia out of the hall and back downstairs to where his wife was.

Adam was about to step in and help Lance but decided against it and stalked off back to his room earning odd looks from Rachel.

Veronica approached Lance and slowly placed a hand on his back as she crouched beside him, said boy flinched as soon as she made contact making her retract her hand quickly. She placed the closed book on his lap and placed her hand back, this time he didn’t flinch but he did lean into the touch. As soon as Veronica had him held close he let the tears fall, Rachel sat beside him too, joing the embrace. Lance sat there in the comfort of his sisters and with his journal tucked safely to his chest.

 

Dinner was practically silent and more tense than anyone would’ve liked.

Lance ate quickly and headed to his room, opening his conversation with Keith. He started off with a simple ‘hello’ to see if the other teen was online. When Keith replied with a ‘what’s up’ Lance asked if he was free for a phone call, he was, and so that’s how Lance spent the rest of his Sunday evening. He told Keith about everything that had happened and Keith had listened, occasionally interrupting Lance to input some kind words.

Lance was so relieved he could talk to Keith about this, he always would be.

 

The following week was a strange one.

His father was off on another flight on the Tuesday so he was out of Lance’s hair for the time being. His mama was still rather upset but Lance was trying to amend things with her. He’d been getting along better with his siblings although Adam was acting a bit out of character, but Lance didn’t pay much mind to it. Lance treasured his time with Keith, he also went round to Romelle’s for a fantastic evening filled with delicious food and a very aggressive game of monopoly.

As for his coach, well he’d had a few more ‘talks’ with him throughout the week but Lance continued as if nothing was wrong. They had their first game against a rival school the next week so the team was being pushed hard. They would be against Galra high, the school Lotor’s father was the principle of. Lotor no longer attended his fathers school due to disagreement between his parents. His mother Honerva was the head of Romelle’s old school, and she’d not wanted Lotor to constantly be under pressure in his fathers school. Zarkon wasn’t the most supportive when it came to Lotor’s decisions, he was still upset over the fact that his son was dating Alfors daughter. The two men had been high school friends before an argument drove them apart. Truth was that Lotor was forced into football, he’d always had a passion for music and would have rather been a member of their schools band and be on the side of the field instead of playing on it. Zarkon has despised the idea of Lotor being in band so he forced football upon him, and Lotor not wanting to disappoint his father, did as he was told.

 

The game was on Friday, it was now Tuesday so time was running out to practice. Shiro had to put the official list of players up the next day so he’d been going around confirming who was playing and who wasn’t. He’d gotten the go ahead from everyone except Lance who he’d struggled to find that us until that Tuesday afternoon when he caught up to the boy in the hallway who was on his way to practice.

“Hey Lance wait up!” He called out, the younger boy slowed down and turned to see Shiro jogging towards him.

“Hey so a couple questions. One, are you okay for the game on Friday?” Lance nodded and hummed in response as they continued on the way to the locker room. “The other thing I wanted to ask is umm-“ he stuttered slightly

“Is what?”

“I’m not pushing you too hard in practice am I?”

“No course not” Lance was confused, the regime Shiro had been using was the same as always “why?”

“Well” Shiro paused trying to form the sentence but unsure of his wording “well I don’t wanna push you too hard after the whole thing with you in the hospital and therapy and everything-“

“Wait- what?” Lance stopped dead in his tracks.

“Oh. Um” Shiro opened and closed his mouth like a helpless fish

“I can’t believe this” Lance muttered. He took off in a sprint to the locker room slamming open the door, many of the team didn’t bother to acknowledge it since it was a regular occurrence for someone to slam the door open.

Lance head straight towards his target who was busy chatting with Kinkade and Hunk. He grabbed the back of the guys shirt and pulled him harshly backwards, making him stumble over a bag.

“What the hell?!” Keith yelled at Lance as he twisted around

“You know what!” Lance snarled, everyone in the room was now looking at the commotion,

“You told him. You promised you wouldn’t! But you did- I thought- I thought you were my friend” his voice cracked as he finished

“What are you talking about?” Keith yelled back

“Oh my- don’t play dumb. You told Shiro. I trusted you!” Lance screamed and launched himself at Keith. They went crashing to the floor and Lance landed a clean hit to Keith’s cheek. Keith on the other hand pushed Lance off him before getting to his feet, but when Lance went for him again he fought back, he too sent a solid fist into Lances face.

Shiro came into the room rushing over to Keith to hold him back, at the same time the coach exited his office and locked Lance’s arms behind his back like Shiro was doing with Keith. Both boys were breathing heavily, Lance had blood running from the small cut on his face caused by Keith’s ring whereas Keith’s nose was bleeding steadily.

“What on earth is going on?!” Mark yelled, the whole team had been frozen during the fight, Adam had stared as it went down, already knowing why Lance was so mad.

“I said what is going on?!” Mark repeated snapping Lance out of it, the young Cuban tensed at the mans voice and yanked one arm out of his coaches grasp.

“Get off of me!” He managed to pull his other arm free, Keith frowned at the interaction, something was off.

“Lance!” Shiro said disapprovingly “watch your tone” Lance was shaking at this point, but to Keith it didn’t seem like he was angry. More like scared.

“Just leave me alone!” Lance yelled as he dashed out the room. Shiro released Keith and the Mark sent him to the nurse.

 

The whole time Keith’s mind was on why Lance looked so terrified

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any spelling errors!  
> -  
> Please leave a comment if you want/have time


	5. V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it’s been so long!  
> Spent a while on this chapter,   
> and just to note, Hunk & Pidge are barely in this because I find them really hard to write for. That’s why Romelle is Lances best friend because I find her fun to write.

Keith sat in the reception for an hour with Shiro, who stood silently beside him, before a disappointed Maria came through the door. Maria was Shiro’s mother, she was American and had met Shiro’s father when she visited his home town. Maria had fostered Keith over a year ago now and there was talk in the small family about adoption but Keith was still unsure, they’d stayed by him throughout his tougher years when he was in finishing middle school and starting highschool, but what if those instances brought them to the end of their tether? Shiro cared, he knew that, he trusted the guy more than he thought he ever could. He never fully trusted Maria, and even though he’d only know Lance for a week or so he trusted the boy more than most. Even now, even after the fight.

Keith knew Lance wasn’t exactly the most stable kid in the school, he himself wasn’t completely stable per say. Something was wrong with Lance. Something other than his anorexia. The way he had just seemed to switch in an instant worried Keith, he had a feeling something more sinister was working behind the scenes.

 

Keith followed Maria out to the car silently and hopped in as soon as he could. He peered out of the window and saw Shiro place a gentle hand on his mothers arm as he spoke to her, but Keith’s eyes soon looked towards another group of people. Lance was stood by a lady who he assumed was his mother, as well as his sisters and brother. His mother waving her hands around furiously at Lance, said boy just looked straight at her with a stone face, Keith continued to watch the scene unfold but his eyes widened once he saw Lance’s mother slap Lance across his face. Although right afterwards she seemed to calm down and she placed her hand where she’d just struck the boy and stroked it lightly before letting her arm fall to her side and getting into the car along with her other children. Keith saw Lance ball his hands into a fist and as he looked up he made eye contact with Keith, although the didn’t look as mad as before, he looked rather blank. Lance stared at Keith for a moment before getting into the car. By this time Shiro and Maria were now too stepping into the car, Maria gave Keith a look that seemed to say ‘we’ll talk at home’, Keith nodded and shoved his earphones in and drowned himself in the music.

-

Lance went straight to his room once he crossed the threshold of his house, his family didn’t try and stop him. Adam watched as Lance made his way to his room sluggishly and couldn’t help the guilt that consumed his mind, he’d let his little brother calm down then he’d tell him, Adam knew perfectly well that there was a possibility of Lance hating him forever but he couldn’t let Lance blame Keith. Keith didn’t deserve to be hated for no reason.

Rosa had collapsed onto the couch in their cosy living room, she was debating wether or not to tell her husband about the fight, she knew she should but she also knew that Raphael would get angry and possibly hurt her children. He was a complicated man, while she had been brought up in a calm and loving environment, Raphael had been brought up in a stricter one, one where homosexuality made you a freak, one where it was okay to hit your children. Granted, Rosa would occasionally raise her hand to her children if they truly had misbehaved and they understood how angry you’d have to make her for that idea to even cross her mind. After minutes of pondering possible outcomes from telling her husband, Adam came shuffling in through the doorway with two cups of tea in his hands, he passed on to his mother before taking a seat next to her.

“Hijo, What happened? You were there, why did Lance- why would lance even do such a thing?” She asked softly, Adam sighed nursing his cup of tea

“It was my fault” he stated simply

“Adam, you don’t need to take the blame ju-“

“No mama. It really was my fault. I told Takashi something, and Lance thought that Keith had said something. Not me”

“Be clearer, what did you tell Shiro?”

“I told him about Lance. About his anorexia” Rosa gasped and copped a hand over her mouth

“Oh- hijo.” She breathed out, Adam turned his eyes away from his mother in shame

“I know- I know. I feel terrible, I only told Takashi because I believed it was in his best interest to know. He’s our team captain, if Lance was struggling then Takashi could lay off or help, I don’t know. It was killing me inside, I needed someone outside the family to talk to”

“Hijo, you cant just tell anybody about Lance, you should’ve asked him-“

“Yeah you should’ve” Lance interrupted as he stood by the door, his face stern but also sad.

“Lance-“ Lance held his hand up as Adam tried to talk

“Adam, you should’ve asked me! I just got into a fight with one of the best people I know! I might’ve lost him for good now because of you” Lance said, tears beginning to show in the corners of his eyes

“Lance I am so sorry. I just- I didn’t know what to do, he kept asking and-“

“Shiro is a pretty persuasive guy I guess” Lance took a deep breath and swallowed his tears “I’m mad at you okay, but I really need as many people that I care about around me right now so I’m not gonna go nuclear on you or your cool boyfriend” Adam visibly relaxed from his tense and rigid position, placed his cup on the table beside him before standing up and making his way over to his little brother, arms open. Lance gladly took the offer and wrapped his arms around Adam’s neck and hugged him tightly.

“Lo siento hermanito” [I’m sorry little brother] Adam whispered in Lance’s ear, to which Lance replied with “está bien” [it’s okay]

Rosa watched the sweet exchange with a small smile, she’d always loved to have had such a beautiful bond with her sisters but alas it never happened. She’d always wanted to raise her children to be there for one another, but she had never expected one of her eldest and her youngest child to be so close, it warmed her heart to see the strong relationship they held, and although they had arguments they always managed to forgive and almost always forget.

“I wanted to apologise to you too mama” Lance said timidly once he was free from Adam’s embrace “I was so insensitive and stupid and I made you mad and I hurt you. You have to know that a lot of the stuff written in my journal was written when I was feeling really low. The part you read was right before I relapsed. It was a really tough time and I was mad at myself but I was blaming anything and everything. I’m sorry” Rosa wiped her eyes of a few escaped tears and stood up, waving her hands in a motion so Lance would come closer, and as soon as he did he was pulled into a bone crushing hug from his mother

“Te amo hijo, no necesitas disculparte. está bien”

[i love you son, you don’t need to apologise. It’s okay]

Things were starting to look up for Lance as far as his home life was concerned. Now he just had to think of one incredible apology for Keith because boy was t gonna have to be good after the fuck up he made.

 

-

 

“Keith? I brought you some dinner” Shiro called from behind the door

“Come in” Keith replied twisting his chair to face the door as Shiro walked in, the older boy gave Keith a small smile and set the plate of food on the desk beside the laptop. Keith sat there expecting his brother to leave but the latter sat on Keith’s bed instead.

“What?”

“Are you okay Keith?” Shiro asked tentatively, Keith just shrugged his shoulders

“Well let’s see” he took an exaggerated breath in “one of my best friends just attacked me in the middle of the locker room and I don’t even know why! And despite this I’m not even that mad- I’m worried! Somethings going on an I’m scared because I don’t know how bad it is and I don’t know if I can help”

“Woah- okay Keith- what?” Shiro asked rather breathlessly

“Somethings going on. More than Lance’s an- um-“

“I know about Lance’s anorexia” he stated calmly, Keith’s eyes widened in realisation

“Oh my god” he sighed, Shiro shook his head questioningly “that’s why Lance was mad. He thought I told you” Keith broke his eye contact with his brother and slammed his fist into his palm “why the hell would he think I’d tell you” he muttered to himself. “Anyway. I think there’s something else, I don’t know what it is but it’s not good Shiro” Keith spoke sadly, Shiro placed his hand on Keith’s and gripped it tight.

“It’ll be okay. Lance just got the wrong end of the stick and it was my fault really, look just be there for him wether your his friend or not”

“Thanks Shiro”

“I got ya back brother”

-

 

Lance was bouncing on the balls of his feet waiting for Keith to enter the parking lot, Romelle had left him in favour of the warm classroom inside since it was freezing outside. Lance watched as students walked into the school alone or in groups, he also saw several teachers make their way in, all looking as miserable as the students, well all except miss Olkari who was practically a living ray of sunshine.

Lance checked his phone for the hundredth time but was stopped when he felt a weight on his shoulder. He twisted his head to see who it was, unfortunately for him it was the one man he wished to never see again. His coach.

“Hello Lance” he spoke lowly, trying not to gain any unnecessary attention. Mark moved so he stood in front of the younger boy blocking his view of the gates. “What?No hello? No apology for acting so rudely yesterday?” Lance felt small. He couldn’t run, he couldn’t yell for help, he was well and truly stuck.

“Sorry” he mumbled

“What was that?” Mark asked tapping his finger to his ear

“I’m sorry. Sir” Lance stuttered out, Mark hummed in appreciation

“Well to make up for it, you can come see me today after school. And remember no telling alright” the older man winked at Lance before giving his shoulder a tight squeeze as if it were a warning. Lance blinked back the tears and grit his teeth, now noticing Keith standing only a couple feet away staring at Lance with concern.

“Hey Lance. You okay?” Keith asked as he approached the brunette, said boy just nodded quickly

“Look” he breathed out “I am so sorry for yesterday. I wasn’t thinking, I was mad at the wrong person, you didn’t deserve what i did to you” Keith opened his mouth to respond but Lance continued on “I shouldn’t have acted so recklessly and- god I- fuck. I’m really bad at this. I don’t want to lose you. You’re one of the best people I know, and you’ve made my life so much more fun and awesome since we started talking, but if you want nothing to do with me then that’s fair and I won’t be mad” Lance finished his rant and looked at Keith expectantly, Keith just smiled softly at the nervous boy and placed his gloved hand onto Lances arm.

“I ain’t mad. I understand why you reacted that way- granted you could’ve talked it out because damn you hit hard” Lance chuckled at the statement

“You hit pretty hard as well”

“Thanks. Thing is I’m as mad as I am worried”

“What do you mean?”

“Lance is everything okay? I mean I don’t know what’s going on with you- I don’t know if it’s family or something else but I want you to know I’m here if-“

“Hey- woah Keith I’m fine” Lance rushed out placing his hand on Keith’s shoulder much like the the latter boy had before. Keith didn’t seem completely satisfied but nodded regardless

“Come on let’s head in I’m freezing my ass off” Lance announced as he dragged a conflicted Keith inside.

 

 

“I see you two made up” Romelle said as she saw the boys bustle through the doorway, Lance was already talking Keith’s ear off but he stopped to say good morning to his best friend. Keith just stood amused as the two teens did their little handshake before returning to their previous activities.

“But I was wondering if you wanted to come to my place to meet my family on Saturday. If it’s too soon then that’s cool but my mama said she wanted to meet you and my siblings too I don’t know about my dad but-“

“I’ll go” Keith interrupted his rambling, Lance blinked in surprise

“Y-you will?” He asked in disbelief

“Yeah” Keith chuckled

“That’s great! Awesome so are you good to come round at like seven or eight on Saturday?”

“eight sounds good for me”

“Cool. Cool cool cool”

 

“Right everyone! Take your seats!” Coran yelled cheerfully after bursting through the door.

 

-

 

After a day filled with subtle apologies all day, Keith eventually parted ways with Lance and once home he went straight to his room and dived head first into his work so he’d finish it before dinner. After about An hour into his English essay, whilst his fingers danced wildly across his keyboard, a notification for a new email came through. Keith expected it to be a confirmation email for the books he’d ordered the night before but alas it was from an unfamiliar address. He knew it was probably spam but Keith still opened it, the curiosity took over and he hesitantly opened the email with a swift click.

Keith’s eyes landed on his name,

‘Dear Keith’

It read. This peaked Keith’s interest and so he read on.

Although by the end a part of him wished he hadn’t

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for any typos  
> -  
> Leave a comment in you want / have time  
> -  
> Tysm for all your support!


	6. VI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> totally unrelated but i'm getting a puppy later today and you bet i'm gonna base Kosmo off of him once our favourite space pup makes an appearance :,)

Keith slammed his laptop lid down and practically jumped to his feet, knocking his chair over with a thud. He raked a hand through his dark hair and began to mutter to himself.

“Shit shit- this isn’t real. _No fucking way”_ he lifted the lid up but once again slammed it back down “it’s real- it’s fucking real _oh my_ -“ Keith crashed down onto his bed burying his head in the sheets, praying for sleep to take over.

 

-

 

As the week went on Lance noticed Keith was acting strange. He often wondered wether it was something he’d done and when voicing his concerns to Romelle she was quick to reassure him that Keith only ever smiled in Lance’s presence. A small part of Lance wished it was him that was the problem so he could sort it or possibly leave Keith in peace. All throughout practice Keith was all over the place but he kept on going and didn’t stop. 

Lance continued to meet with his coach after practice and all while the creep was putting his hands where he shouldn’t, Lance couldn’t stop worrying about his dark haired friend. Unfortunately when being closely looked at by Mark, looking rather blank and away from the act that was taking place was the worst he could be doing. 

“Lance? Are you really that ungrateful” Mark snapped, grabbing Lance’s chin, forcing the teen to look into his eyes. “Don’t know why i bother sometimes” Mark hummed in thought “then again I suppose that you were the easiest to get to” Mark tightened the grip on his wrist and Lance averted his eyes and steadied his breathing. It worried him sometimes at how normal he was beginning to find these ‘meetings’ he knew he shouldn’t but he felt like there was no avoiding it.

 

Lance made his way out of school as fast as possible but was pulled back with quite some force by someone yanking on his back strap. He twisted around to see James. 

“Hey man you took your time” James said swinging his arm around Lance’s shoulder

“Yeah” the latter replied almost breathlessly, a nervous laugh escaping his lips “what are you- what are you doing here?” 

“I said I’d drive you home so we could work on the History project” James replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world

“Oh right- yes sorry” 

“You’re so forgetful sometimes McClain” 

 

An hour into the project and Lance’s phone buzzed, it was Keith checking if they were still on for tomorrow. Lance smiled at Keith’s necessity to know all the details, and to double check them. 

“who’s that?” James asks, his mouth full of pizza

“Close your damn mouth you heathen” James swallowed but not without a roll of his eyes 

“Happy? Now who is it? Hot girl? Hot guy?” James was practically bouncing on the spot, Lance sighed 

“It’s Keith” he said taking a sip from his water

“So you two a thing?” James asked innocently. Lance choked on his water and shoved a hand over his mouth to stop it from spewing out, 

“What?! No! No no no no no” He began to defend himself waving his arms wildly 

“Woah man calm. Just asking, I mean you guys seem pretty close but I don’t know” he mumbled 

“Well we’re not a thing” Lance said rather sadly, James stared at the boy for a moment assessing his tone 

“Would you want to be?” Lance’s eyes shot to James’ face and he opened his mouth to reply but he faltered

“I don’t know” he whispered eventually “I’ve only been speaking and hanging with him for what? A week or two?”

“So?” James shrugged his shoulders “doesn’t mean you don’t want something more” 

“I guess it doesn’t” 

 

 

Saturday morning rolled around quickly and Lance went downstairs to find his father sat at the table along with Adam.

“Morning Adam, papa” he nodded and started to make himself some coffee

“Good morning Lance” his father said, placing his paper down on the table, readjusting his glasses “Rosa says you have a friend coming round tonight” he asks

“Yeah, his name’s Keith” Lance answered quietly leaning against the counter by his coffee

“He’s Takashi’s little brother” Adam supplied, Raphael nodded in acceptance and picked his paper up once more and continued to read it. Adam finished up his toast as Lance was leaving the kitchen with his coffee sat comfortably in his hands.

“I’m heading off to work but I’ll be back at three” Adam says patting his little brother lightly on the back before leaving the house. Lance retreated into the living room and curled up on the couch until he was disturbed by a disheveled looking Veronica 

“Jesus what happened to you?” Lance chuckled at his sisters messy appearance 

“Up until four chatting with acxa” Veronica mumbled 

“You guys are too cute” Lance sighed “ I wish i had someone like that” 

“You will. Patience young one, patience” Veronica rubbed her eyes and plucked Lance’s coffee from his hands 

“Ronnie!” Lance exclaimed trying to take back his stolen drink 

“Nope. It’s mine now” Veronica stated and sipped at the coffee whilst Lance just huffed in annoyance and sank back down into the couch.

 

 

Lance spent over an hour antagonising about what he should wear for dinner, he eventually settled on a blue button up shirt and jeans, he spent way too much time straightening his hair as he did every morning. Meanwhile Keith was too fussing over his outfit and even enlisted his brothers help and acxa’s who he had on FaceTime.

“It looks fine Keith” Shiro sighed 

“Yeah you look hot Kogane” Acxa said bluntly, Keith shot her a look and went back to messing with his shirt button.

“Well you’ve run outta time now Keith, we gotta blast. See ya Acxa” Shiro smiled and ended the call, dragging his brother through the door and to the car.

“Calm down Keith. Why are you so worried anyway?” Shiro asked as he drove down the straight road “I mean if anyone should be worried it’s me! I’m the one dating one of their sons” he chuckled but his laughter soon died down when he noticed Keith start to gnaw his lip and pick at his already chipped nail polish. “Keith what’s going on? Do you-“ he paused pondering over wether or not now was a good time “never mind” he muttered, casting a worried glance towards his brother before driving on down to the McClain house.

As soon as they arrived in the driveway, both boys could already hear the muffled shouts and screams from outside, not aggressive though, playful and some demanding. Keith froze as soon as he heard the commotion, Shiro came up beside him and wrapped his arm around Keith’s shoulder 

“It’s always like this, they’re kinda crazy. But the best kind” 

The voices grew louder and when they knocked on the door Keith was sure he heard Lance yelling at somebody in Spanish and for some reason it gave Keith a reason to smile for the first time that evening. The door was opened by Adam who’d given Keith a sweet smile before kissing his boyfriend and ushering both boys inside. Adam guided the new arrivals through the narrow corridor and steered them clear from the chaos 

“no tengo la maldita espátula!” **_[i don’t have the damn spatula!]_**

Lance yelled back to his brother Marco over all the noise in the kitchen, he was currently hunched over the various pots and pans with his shirt sleeves rolled up, his straight hair was no more and had returned to its natural curls due to the heat.

“Te lo di hace apenas un minuto!” ** _[i gave it to you barely a minute ago!]_**

Marco shouted in response, Lance just groaned loudly and almost knocked a bowl to the floor “sabes lo que dicen, si no puedes soportar el calor, sal de la cocina!” **_[you know what they say, if you can't handle the heat get out the kitchen!]_**

Lance scowled and continued to look for the missing spatula, he ended up searching the hallway and then stumbled into the living room, literally stumbled, as in fall to his knees and pull himself up using the door handle. Lance looked up to see Adam biting his lip to prevent himself from laughing, said brother tilted his head to the space beside Lance, once he turned he saw Keith. 

“Oh- er- okay- well hi” Lance eventually spat out “you guys seen a spatula?” He asked, Keith’s brow furrowed confused as to what that had to do with anything, luckily for him Adam noticed the confusion 

“That’s what he and Marco were yelling about” Keith nodded in understanding “Lance why would the spatula be in here?” Adam continued this time addressing his brother 

“Well I don’t know! Maybe it wanted to watch some Netflix or jam out to some Queen!” He said gesturing towards the CD player

“Lance. Go back to the kitchen and use the spatula that is hanging on the rack and come back once things are settled okay” 

“Gotcha brother” Lance gave Adam the thumbs up “see you two soon” he said to Shiro and Keith before rushing back to the kitchen.

“Lance’s hair is curly” Keith muttered more to himself than anyone else, although Adam still hummed in response, Keith’s head turned to Adam quickly “he straightens it when he goes out, no idea why though” Adam shrugged “mama is always telling him to stop straightening it” 

“It looks better natural” Keith said and he missed the sly look the older boys gave each other.

 

Veronica appeared at the doorway half an hour later and led the boys to the dining room, Lance swerved around his little niece and nephew whilst holding some roast chicken in his hands. He quickly turned back around to the kitchen to grab more food but not before smiling at Keith apologetically. Lance and his mother were the last to sit down, Lance sat at the head of the table, Keith on one side and Adam on the other, his father was sat directly opposite. Rachel who had finally emerged from her room was sat on a smaller table along with Nadia and Sylvio, ‘the kids table’ was what the McClains has dubbed it. 

The food was eaten much quicker then expected and so the small idle chatter began.

“So how did you and Leandro meet?” Rosa asked Keith who sealed his mouthful of water with a raised eyebrow 

“ _Leandro?"_

“Yeah yeah it’s my name” Lance nudged Keith’s arm with his his tone playful 

“Well I first met him ages ago since we’re on the same football team”

“Oh- yes silly me!” Rosa exclaimed 

“We only really started talking a few weeks ago so”

“I have to say you’ve been good for my son so thank you Keith” Kieth nodded in gratitude and saw Lance look anywhere but at him, the family and their guests continued to talk and all was good until Lance’s father asked the one question Lance wished never came up

“So do you know about his problem” 

“Problem sir?” 

“You know his-“ Raphael waved his hand absentmindedly, 

“He knows papa” Lance almost choked out “everyone in the room knows” he clarified the fact Shiro too knew of his eating disorder. Both guests looked down rather awkwardly, feeling as though this conversation was not for them.

“Oh. And you’re still friends?” 

“Yes sir” Keith replied with a slight bite to his tone, Lance suddenly found the tablecloth incredibly interesting and diverted all his attention to it. “Quite frankly sir, regardless of Lance’s ‘problem’ as you call it, I wouldn’t stop being his friend. He’s a great guy and his personal issues are not for me to judge, after all I’m pretty sure everybody has something they’re not especially proud of or something they’re ashamed of” Keith carried on in a calm tone. He saw Shiro start to fiddle much like Lance was, Keith knew it was to do with his PTSD, Shiro had been in a car accident as a young child which earned him a nasty scar across the bridge of his nose as well as a head full of horrible memories from that night.

Rosa sensed that if this conversation were to continue then she was sure it would turn ugly, so she dismissed everyone from their tables after asking wether or not Keith and Shiro were staying over to which the boys accepted since it was late and driving was the last thing Shiro would’ve liked to do.

Lance took Keith up to his room and despite the previous talks at the table he was more nervous about Keith seeing his room. 

“So this is me” Lance mumbled letting Keith enter, he closed the door behind him and sat on his desk chair picking up a drumstick to spin in his fingers.

“You play the drums?” 

“Sometimes, Romelle has a kit since her dads used to play, so we sometimes play together. She plays the guitar and sings so it’s pretty cool” Lance watched as his friend took his room in and saw that the shorter boys attention was drawn to the record player that sat by his window.

“Got that for my eleventh birthday, I’m kinda obsessed with records and stuff”

“I’ve always wanted a record player” Keith confessed, tracing his fingers gently along the sides of the item “what stuff you listen to?”

“Mostly Queen. Kinda obsessed with them, Roger Taylor was one of the main reasons I tried drumming” Lance got up off his chair and went over to the small pile of records and picked out one putting it on the record player, soon enough the song ‘you’re my best friend’ began playing and Lance retired back to his desk chair.

“Are you okay?” Lance suddenly asked, Keith looked at him incredulously 

“Me? Okay? What about you” 

“I’m fine, my dad has always been a bit off about my issue” 

“That sucks, and I’m fine too just have some stuff going on” 

“Wanna talk?” 

“Later” Keith assured the boy and sat on the bed. He looked above his and saw some stars stuck onto the ceiling, his eyes darted around the room, landing on various paintings and pictures that had been ripped from Lance’s sketchbook. There was one wall with many tickets and pictures stuck to it 

“That’s my bucket list wall” Lance said “Me and Romelle started it in freshman year, she has one too” he smiled fondly. “We should probably get ready to sleep, I’m exhausted. I’ll lend you some stuff” Lance got up to his drawer and handed Keith some clothes, which ended up fitting rather well, Keith noticed how Lance’s shirt hung loosely on the boys frame and a wave of anger crossed over him, he mentally slapped himself for even thinking that he had the right to be angry at Lance. But he couldn’t help it. Lance was a magnificent person and yet all the Cuban teen saw was flaws, Keith knew what it felt like to feel worthless, to feel like nobody wanted you, to feel lost. And Keith was no stranger to self inflicted pain, he was aware of the damage it could do to loved ones. He still remembered when Shiro first saw the pale scars on his thighs and the few small ones scattered on his upper arm, Shiro had been angry, not with Keith but with himself. 

Keith now realised how Shiro had felt, he was mad because he had noticed the outline of Lance’s ribs and wrists become more prominent as the days went by and yet he still said nor did nothing, but a part of the reason he never said a thing was partially because of Lance, the boy never faltered, he was always appearing upbeat and competitive, it was as if nothing was wrong. But so much was wrong, much more than Keith knew, too much was wrong.

Keith lay on Lance’s bed waiting for the other boy to return, he stared up at the ceiling and the stars he’d noticed before were now more noticeable thanks to the dimmer lighting. The soft tunes of various Queen songs were heard from the record player, there was something soothing about it, something calming. Lance soon reappeared and jumped clumsily into his bed. 

They laid there in a comfortable silence staring at the glowing stars stuck above them,

“I got an email” Keith said suddenly, Lance turned his head to the side and let his eyes roam the noirette’s face. Said boy sighed quietly and faces Lance, catching his gaze 

“Who from” Lance asked staring back into the violet eyes of the boy opposite him, Keith took a moment as if it physically hurt him to even think about the subject

“My mother” he breathed out “my biological mother” 

“Keith when did you get the email?”

“Last week” 

“Keith why didn’t you say anything?” 

“I don’t know. I guess, I was still processing it. I mean the woman who was supposed to raise me but left me when I was a young child suddenly gets in contact with me- god knows why”

“What did she want?”

“Wanted to meet with me- talk some bullshit like that”

“Are you gonna talk to her?”

“I don’t know. At first I felt like I owed it to her- I mean she’s my mom! But then again I don’t owe her anything, she didn’t raise me, _she wasn’t there_ ” Keith’s voice cracked and a single tear escaped his eye, Lance but his lip lightly contemplating his next move, he slowly lifted his hand and placed it on the side of Keith’s pale face and brushed away the fallen tear with a small smile. 

“It’ll work out. Whatever you decide, I’ll support you” Lance reassured him, Keith smiled back at the boy and took his own hand and placed it upon Lance’s, bringing it down in the middle of them both slowly interlocking his and Lance’s fingers together. 

It was a simple gesture but it brought a great amount of comfort to the two teens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave a comment if you want/have time  
> -  
> all Spanish was translated with google  
> -  
> i'm obsessed with Queen and Roger was my favourite band member so i decided to implant that obsession into Lance and Romelle.
> 
> ALSO: i'm most likely not gonna write Hunk & Pidge into this fic much because i find it very hard to write for them, that's why Romelle is Lance's best friend because i find it easy to write for her since she's pretty much based off myself lmao


	7. VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slightly longer chapter  
> — sorry it took so long!  
> — also sorry that it jumps a lot with time but i can’t be bothered to write filler stuff so  
> — I’ve had this chapter in mind for a while but I’m kinda making it up as I go along, so sorry if it’s kinda patchy in some places :)

Lance woke up earlier than usual in a quieter than usual house. He slipped out of bed leaving Keith to continue his slumber. The stairs creaked under Lance’s feet as he made his way to the kitchen where he found mother sat at the table sipping her cup of tea slowly.

“Morning mama” he kissed his mother good morning and began to cook his breakfast, as much as he didn’t want to, after his heavy dinner the night before Lance felt like he’d have to cut down the food in the next few days, but his mother was watching and he knew she’d make him eat something.

“Keith seems like a lovely boy”

“He is” he replied whilst he bustled around the kitchen in search of the eggs

“How are you feeling?” Rosa asked sounding rather apprehensive, Lance- who’s back was turned to his mother scrunched up his face in confusion before turning around

“I’m fine, why?” He answered cautiously

“No reason really. It’s just it was a large meal last night and I’m proud of how much you managed”

“Oh, right Yeah” Lance struggled a smile and turned back around glancing down at his stomach and carried on making his scrambled eggs

“I have to get ready for a shift at the hospital, I’ll see you later Leandro” Rosa placed her cup in the sink, kissed lance on his temple and climbed the stairs passing a sleepy Keith.

Meanwhile Lance was leaning over the table, as he raked his hand through his hair contemplating whether or not to throw the eggs away but just as he was about to empty the pan Keith walked in so he quickly placed the pan back on the stove as if nothing had happened

“Mornin Keith” Lance greeted him shakily, Keith eyed him slightly suspiciously but nodded his head in acknowledgement, taking a seat at the wooden table “want some eggs?” Lance waited for Keith’s response and as soon as the noirette had confirmed he wanted some, Lance busied himself in making them but also adding a few strips of bacon for Keith.

Once everything was cooked Lance gave Keith his plate which was decorated with three strips of bacon alongside a helping of scrambled eggs, the still sleepy teen thanked Lance before digging into the food. Keith glanced at his friends plate to see only a small amount of eggs with a piece of toast, he frowned slightly unbeknownst to Lance who slowly munched on his food too.

“Sorry if I woke you up” Lance said once he’d finished swallowing

“It’s okay, I’m usually up in like an hour or two anyway”

“Sorry I deprived you of the extra hours, but hey, this is the quietest this house gets so feel blessed” Keith slapped his hand to his heart

“I thank you for this honour!” He exclaimed, the two boys continued to chat and eventually made their way to the living room to watch some mindless reality show. Adam appeared shortly afterwards giving the two teens a good morning but having to rush out to get to work. Adam worked at the local garage helping fix up cars and usually worked late in the week, much like his mother who worked weekends since she stayed home Monday to Friday.

Keith had stayed for a few hours after they’d finished breakfast but him and Shiro left to go home around midday.

Lance continued to wander the house, it steadily got louder and louder as the other family members woke up, the familiarity brought a small smile to Lance’s lips, he always felt like he needed a constant in his life and he could always count on his rowdy family to be that. The rest of the weekend moved on rather slowly Lance’s only entertainment being his text conversation with Keith and playing the drums with Romelle rocking out on the guitar.

 

Lance walked into Monday feeling like shit. He’d realised the various pieces of homework that were due- were no longer tucked in his bag. He was so fucked. The excuses rolled off his tongue and despite the detention from his math teacher there were no other punishments. He got to lunch and once again felt the sense of dread creep into his mind just the smell of the fattening meal that sat only meters away beyond the door was enough to make him feel queasy. He was about to leave and avoid lunch all together but Romelle had other ideas when she linked her arm with Lance’s and practically skipped into the cafeteria dragging him behind her all the way to their usual where Keith and Allura were sat. Once Romelle had greeted the two at the table she led Lance to the lunch line, and as he stood and slowly shuffled down the line Lance began to think of possible ways to get out of the situation but alas it was no use, the lunch lady was looking at him expectantly so he pointed at the pasta and winced slightly when he saw how much was piled on the plate. Throughout his meal he picked at his food but ate more than he’d wanted, luckily for him nobody had noticed his inner turmoil because they were too wrapped up in game preparations for Thursday- their first game. It’d been scheduled weeks ago but icy fields had prevented it from going ahead. Allura had been somewhat relieved since her and the rest of the cheer team were nowhere near ready with their half time routine.

Lunch soon ended and the day went on without a hitch, as did much of the week, well during school hours that was. Lance was still attending ‘meetings’ with Mark and he still went away feeling used and dirty. The bruises did not let up, he always seemed to find a new one anytime he looked at himself, Lance usually passed them off as being football injury’s or just due to his clumsy nature and that seemed to satisfy most.

When Thursday came all that was talked about was the upcoming game, even the teachers were hyped up for it- well except the old bat from the math department who seemed to despise any form of fun. Speaking of the game, all went well for Garrison High, they beat their opposition by a long shot and the team went out for celebratory dinner post game. All was good for Lance that night, but not so much for Keith who’d received a phone call that night. A phone call from his social worker about his mother. She wanted to meet with him but Keith was apprehensive- so he called Lance as soon as he got off the phone with his social worker. Lance had said that he should give her a chance but he also said he could see why Keith would be reluctant, and that ultimately it was his decision. said boy had thanked Lance and pondered the pros and cons before speaking to Shiro who had given the same sort of comments as Lance. A few days had passed before he decided and he called his social worker back to confirm that he would like to meet with his mother, his social worker had said it’d be month or two before it could happen which was okay with Keith- the more prep time, the better. This news was shared with Lance the next day and the latter had been supportive with this decision, saying that if shit hit the fan then he’d be on the other end of the phone line ready to listen.

 

 

2 weeks passed and in those weeks Lance cut his food intake down significantly, he noticed his weight drop and couldn’t help but feel slightly relieved although due to his rapid loss of weigh he found himself feeling more tired than usual so he chugged an energy drink and hoped for the best. Friday would be game night for the team, they were against Etheria high who were one of their tougher rivals. Practices had been intense and Lance couldn’t help but notice Keith soothing his aching shoulder after practice with ice more often than not, he’d never asked what Keith had done but then again they all had secrets.

Romelle was starting to notice Lance’s tiredness and this caused her to worry but her best friend had told her not to worry and to just focus on cheering the team on in the game. Keith too had noticed the change in Lance but whenever he tried to ask the boy about it he managed to swiftly change the subject much to Keith irritation.

 

 

Game night had approached and all the players were sat anxiously in the locker room waiting to get out and play. The coach and Shiro were giving the team a pep talk and most of the team was listening intently but Lance wasn’t. He was staring at the floor blankly, he was paler than he had been earlier and Keith noticed the slight tremor in his hands, once Shiro had finished talking he yelled out

“Let’s go win this!” He punched the air above him and the team all cheered

“Let’s go lions!” They yelled, this snapped Lance out of his trance like state so he plastered on a smile and cheered along with the rest of them but his behaviour didn’t go unnoticed by Kieth, but he let it be for now.

The atmosphere on and around the field felt incredible, their first game of the season had been good but nowhere near as exciting as this one since they were going up against one of their biggest rivals, Etheria high, they had a mixed team too and certain players could really play. For instance two players Catra and Adora who were also dating, were incredibly good at what they did although Catra was more vicious when it came to competition.

Once the game had begun it felt electric, the first half of the game had been tough but the Lions were pulling ahead of Etherias team - the horde - Keith was downing a bottle of water when his brother approached him

“Hey do you think Lance is doing okay?” Keith glanced over to Lance who was sat with Adam beside him, the tremor still plagued Lance’s hands.

“Honestly I don’t know Shiro, he’s been playing good but I just don’t know” Shiro too eyed the McClain’s and nodded before taking water for himself and leaving Keith to rest. Adam soon left his little brother after patting him on the back and leaving for his boyfriend, so Keith was about to accompany Lance but the coach beat him to it, the older man clapped his hand onto Lance’s shoulder and the latter flinched and his posture became stiff. Keith frowned and continued to watch the interaction, it was strange, slightly confrontational perhaps, the coach leant down and whispered something into Lance’s ear which caused the boy to cast his eyes downward and reply with a short nod, it seemed to satisfy the coach who stood back up with a smile upon his face and returned to the other faculty that stood by the bleachers. Keith didn’t waste another second before striding over to his friend.

“You okay?” He asked calmly 

“I’m fine” Lance snapped, he turned to see who had addressed him and once he saw it was Keith his face softened “Sorry” he mumbled

“It’s cool. You excited for the second half?” Keith sat down beside Lance rubbing his hands together to warm them up since that particular evening had decided to be crisp and cool- too cold for Keith’s liking.

“Yeah I guess”

“You sure you’re okay? You don’t look so good”

“I’m fine Keith, just- just nervous”

“alright- but hey if you don’t feel good just tell Shiro he’ll understand”

“I know. Adams already been here trying to get me to sit out” he laughed weakly

“Half times up! Get your asses back on the field lions!” Shiro’s voice carried across the pitch and the team replied with a chorus of chants as they ran out to their positions, although Lance went rather sluggishly to his position earning concerned glances from his team and his family.

The beginning of the second half went smoothly enough but The Horde were catching up, Catra had not let up and continued to be a force to be reckoned with.

It was in the following minutes that things started to go downhill very quickly.

The whistle had blown and all the players ran to do their job, all except Lance.

When Shiro had been ready to throw to Lance he paused since the boy wasn’t there, unfortunately his hesitation allowed the opposition to steal the ball, but Shiro wasn’t as bothered about that in the present moment

“Shiro What are you doing?!” Keith called out to his brother but he soon saw the problem.

It was as if it was happening in slow motion, Lance who stood where he’d started was beginning to fall. Keith didn’t think before running towards him only just catching the boy in time so his head didn’t crash onto the cold ground. He held Lance in his arms and pulled of his helmet, by now many other players had crowded around them and Adam as well as some medics pushed through the crowd. The medics pushed Keith out of the way much to the teens dismay, Shiro latched onto his panicked brother and watched as the medics checked over Lance, he saw one of them call an ambulance and he was beginning to fear the worst. Catra was crouched near Lance’s feet with Adora behind her, Catra’s face was scrunched up in concern and confusion as she studied the boy herself, she knew she recognised the guy and not because of football. Then it hit her. She slapped Adora’s leg urgently and pulled her girlfriend out of the crowd.

The coaches had agreed they’d have to reschedule the game out of both fairness and sympathy for the fallen player.

The ambulance sirens echoed around the field and soon enough Lance was being hauled into the back of the vehicle, Adam joined his brother and soon enough they were gone. Keith was already running to Shiro’s car with his brother not far behind as well as two other players, Catra and Adora.

“Hey you mind if we catch a lift with you guys to the hospital?” Catra rushed out to which Shiro just nodded and they too sped off down the road. The rest of the McClain family was on their way too with the exception of Raphael who hadn’t attended the game. Romelle had pulled Allura with her, both still dressed in their Cheer uniform with paint streaked on their faces, they both excused themselves and made their way to Allura’s car.

 

 

Lance was taken straight to intensive care, Adam had explained past health problems but had been stopped from entering the unit and was made to wait in the reception. He slumped down into the plastic chair and tried to dry his eyes of tears when Shiro, Keith, Catra and Adora came rushing in. Adam stood and Shiro held him as if he could just slip away at any moment, Keith stood behind them, his fingers tapping against his leg anxiously, Catra had left her girlfriends side to go to the reception desk and talk to the receptionist

“Where is he?- is he okay?- is he- i” Keith stumbled in his words breathlessly

“I don’t know Keith- I should’ve made him sit out- oh god-“ Adam rambled as he sat down, Shiro sat beside him running reassuring circles on his back.

“I’m Adora by the way” the blonde spoke quietly feeling rather out of place without Catra.

“Shiro” He said kindly “and this is Adam and my little brother Keith” Shiro pointed accordingly to each boy “I don’t mean to sound rude but why are you here?”

“Oh- um it’s Catra she’ll explain, I don’t really know if it’s my place to say” Shiro nodded in understanding turning back to Adam.

Catra returned minutes later with a clipboard in hand, Adora quirked an eyebrow questioningly

“I was supposed to come in a couple days ago for an appointment” she said, sitting down opposite Adam who’d begun to pay attention to they two girls, once Catra was aware that all three guys had been watching her she sighed and began to explain

“I knew Lance from here, we were in the same ward. I was also a recovering anorexic, although I was in here for a relapse when Lance came in, we used to joke about and talk sometimes. He was one of the few good things about being stuck in here” Adora smiled sadly at her girlfriend,

“Thanks for being a friend to him” Adam thanked her, his voice slightly hoarse from his sore throat, Catra nodded shortly and finished filling her form out for a rescheduling of her appointment, she then handed it back to the receptionist.

Soon after, the rest of the McClains came rushing in and Adam explained what was happening.

Keith on the other hand was pacing near the doors into the intensive care unit peering in to see Lance being checked over and over, suddenly more doctors surrounded the boy and Keith began to panic more. Keith then saw a doctor begin to push up and down on Lance’s chest, it was at this moment that he burst through the doors, various doctors and nurses began to try hold him back but he pushed relentlessly against them so he could reach Lance. Keith made it to the foot of the bed and saw that the heart monitor line was flat, a horrible piercing monotone beep could be heard and Keith couldn’t stop his tears from falling, but to his relief seconds later the beeps began to fall into a pattern again. Keith soon felt a strong grip on his right shoulder

“Get off me!” He almost shouted as he tried to shove off the weight upon his shoulder

“Hey! Woah woah- look he’s your friend?” The man asked, Keith nodded “okay then calm down and you can stay- but you gotta keep your distance while they work” Keith once again nodded and was led to a quiet corner of the room with a clear view of his friend “he’ll be okay” the man said reassuringly before leaving Keith to watch after Lance as the boy was tended to by half a dozen people.

 

 

Keith had watched over Lance like a hawk from the secluded little corner, the Doctor- who’d later introduced himself as Michael, had brought Keith a cup of coffee at some point to which Keith was grateful. Michael had also kept him up to date on Lance’s condition until he finally came to tell him that they’d be moving Lance to a private ward. Keith had followed the nurses as they transported the still unconscious Lance to his new bed, He watched as they hooked him up to some machines, and he waited till they’d left before he sat beside Lance. He knew he wouldn’t have much time so he decided just to sit with his friend until the rest of his family came,

“Oh my poor boy” Rosa breathed out as she approached her son who lay incredibly still, Keith swiftly got up from his seat and left the room passing by Lance’s siblings. Adam looked as if he was about to say something as he passed but decided against it in favour of seeing his little brother, Keith just left the room and began to wonder the halls ignoring Shiro’s calls for him which grew fainter the further he walked.

He felt lost, he felt so out of place without Lance by his side. He hadn’t felt this alone since he lost his father, and he hated the feeling.

Keith eventually reached the front doors of the hospital and pushed them open, welcoming the cool air that flooded his lungs as soon as he stepped foot outside.

He welcomed the cold air because it made him feel numb, although no matter how numb his body was, there was no way he’d be able to calm his mind as it was overflowing with ‘what ifs’ like what if he’d made Lance sit out? Would that have stopped this? What if he had paid more attention to his physical state? Could he have helped?

 

Keith was at a loss, he just didn’t know how or _if_ he could help his friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any typos, hope you enjoyed!
> 
> — comment if you have time/if ya want to, helps inspire me I guess, thanks for all the support so far though x


	8. PLEASE READ

Ok so not a chapter, sorry. 

I haven’t updated this in so long and it’s due to writers block, I have the ideas and rough plan of future chapters it’s just finding time and a way to write them that I’m struggling with so I thought I’d take time away from this fic to work on another one that I’ve been more motivated to write, I intend to finish it within the next couple weeks so then I’ll focus on this fic, I often write little segments of a chapter and eventually it is completed.

it may take some time but this fic is not discontinued, just on a hiatus. 

Sorry for taking so long to address the situation, till next time x

 


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